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Debbie, Joseph DeMatthews Mom Always thinking of you & Emma & ur Family November 12, 2012
Debbie & Joseph DeMatthews Mom Always thinking of you & your Family October 23, 2012
Debbie/Joseph DeMatthews Mom Holly & family you are in my prayers March 3, 2012
Debi: Angel Andrew's Momma Just passing by December 31, 2008

As I read virtually every word on the memorial site of a complete stranger, I found myself feeling so overwhelmed for his wife and family. The "first" everything is so difficult following the death of a loved one. But in all honesty, the first year for me, was a constate state of grief, anger, bargaining with God and depression. The second year is when the numbness began to slowly dimminish and I could feel, REALLY FEEL what my heart knew that I had to accept before any type of healing could take place.

On April 14th, 2004, my beautiful only sister and best friend, was diagnosed with Stage IV Pancreatic Cancer with Metastisis to her liver. I work in Hospice so I knew that something was terriably wrong. For almost a year, she was misdiagnosed, undertreated and allowed to suffer unbearable pain. I was livid with Physicians, even those who are supposed to be the absolute BEST at Duke Medical Center in Durham, NC! She only lived two months and four days following her diagnosis, but I was at her side when she died and I made sure that her pain was controlled as hospice was called in as soon as I knew the prognosis. To this day I'm angry that she suffered so much pain for so long when cancer was eating her alive. I read that there has been some anger about the same or a similar situation with Hollie. God, I am so sorry and I pray that it didn't go on as long as my sister's situation did.

The next summer, on July 12th, 2005, our 18 year old son was ejected from his car in a very tragic auto accident. He died four days later secondary to blunt force trauma to his head. Honestly, I was still grieving for the loss of my sisterr, and when Andrew died, I wanted to call her...I needed her to help me, but she was gone.

Eight months after Andrew's death, my Daddy died of Lung Cancer just three months after being diagnosed.

So, I know your pain and I am so sorry. Hollie sounded like a man who loved life and his family. I'm sure you felt his absence constantly during the holidays. Isn't it just so odd that you sense that they might just be in the other room, or "just around the corner," yet your heart tells you that they aren't coming back?

I'm sorry this was so lengthy; I simply wanted to offer my condolences and extend an open ear if you ever need to talk or send an email. Please visit Andrew's site if and when you feel that you can.

May God Bless You all,

Debi Collins    

merry honey October 19, 2008

I am so sorry that you had very serious health problems and no one caught them.

I love you and miss you.

Merry, Dale and Em thinking of you September 18, 2008

There are so many things I wish I had said, so many things I wish I had done. I think about the three of you all the time. I think about Darrell all the time. I dream about him, all of you and the rest of us. I ask God to please give us strength to face each morning and peace to calm us at night.      

                                                        Love Mart                                         

Merry Hollie August 19, 2008

I'm sorry you left life too soon. We should have had 50 more years together. I am sorry that you had to endure pain all your life and in death.  Our love will always shine!  

Love you always

Emma ...... August 15, 2008

My prayers go to my mom and brother who were with my dad when he passed. I am sorry that I was not physically there with you. I am also sorry for the pain you had to endure.

I love you very much!!



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