Hollie Darrell Smith

Today is Dale's birthday. I miss all those times we would have cookout with the works or ham, turkey, ice cream and cake from nu-era bakery.

I miss you helping with everything, sampling all the food. When we go in to west virginia I will get him a cake from nu-era. I love and miss you

I  was walking up to the big pond remembering how we would take the kids out, when they were little to dig for ginseng. You would carry Dale and I would carry Emma. We had so much fun taking the kids and whom ever wanted to go on trips. We would ride around in the truck and go 4-wheeling.  Remember when Jeff was on the back of the truck and  grabbed a chestnut that still had it's pricklys on it.  Some of the best times was when we took the boat out fishing on the lakes. When Michelle thought Jason was going to get her. We had some good times.  It is too quite around the farm without you. We were always doing something. I love and miss you so mush.

 

I think of you all the time and I sometimes wonder if this family can get through this bad dream we are all having. You know the old saying about never knowing what you have until its gone. I now know what the family and I had and I truly know what we are missing with you gone. I tell O stories about you all the time and when Ameila is older I will tell her about you. I don't want them to forget you.      
I am going to visit the farm before Merry leaves. I need to be there. I can't explain it its just something I have to do. I feel as if I can be with you one more time. I have been fighting this demon called depression and sometimes I win and sometimes I loose. I have lost most of my battles with him this week and you know what that means. FOOD!!! Lots and lots of food. I don't care what it is or what it tastes like just as long as there is lots of it. And yes from behind I do look like an old two legged milk cow. So when I go to the farm I'm going to leave my depression there and bring all good thoughts back with me.
Sometimes I can think of you and smile or laugh and other times I hurt so bad I think I can't go on. I know you would want me to get on with life and not be so sad. But life without you will always be sad and hurtful.
I miss you so much my dear brother, I miss you so much.

Well we made it to GA, but its so lonely here, the girls stayed in Hawaii. I cry every day over them being so far away. I wish you were here to tell them to come home, they always listened to you. Molly has a new boyfriend named Daniel. She works for him at a hot dog stand. Salena is waiting to start work for babies r us. They promised me they would only stay a few months then come to GA. Salena wants to go back to Logan to be close to mom, they talk every day. Don jumped for the first time in 5 yrs the other day he said it went good but said he was getting to old for his job(lol). His students call him SSG Airborne. We have a nice place on Ft Benning but its empty, we have no furniture. We miss you so much. We were at the river and Don turned to me and said he missed going fishing with you . He misses you so much, he talks about you all the time. He told me that he had so much he wanted to talk to you about this last deployment . I'm so proud of mom she is doing so good but she is like everyone else she has her bad days, I worry about her. I tell her all the time not to worry about Bub that he is with you and you'll take care of him for her. We love and miss you so very very much hugs and kisses

Aunt Di and I were driving around looking at some places for mom and the directions we were given were terrible. Needless to say, we ended up in the boondocks and the locals weren't much help. They couldn't tell us where we needed to go either. So, we drove around and just made the best of it. I started laughing because I thought of you when we would get lost. You would be cursing and laughing and we always had a good time. (Except when we ate gas station food and I got food poisoning.) And yes Aunt Di does know where every Dairy Queen is located in 8 counties. If there is one near, she will sniff it out. I had fun riding around looking at the pretty farms here in WV and getting lost. I wish you were here to get lost with us. I miss you so much. You are the best!

     I love you!!!!